<Althego>
deployed with nice view of eart hfrom high uop
<FLHerne>
.outcome add Having believed yourself to be totally blind for five years, you suddenly discover that you were merely wearing too large a helmet.
<LunchBot>
Added outcome: Having believed yourself to be totally blind for five years, you suddenly discover that you were merely wearing too large a helmet.
<raptop>
o_O
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<sandbox>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You accept a contract asking you to take atmospheric pressure readings on Jool at an altitude of -200 meters. Your rockets' flight certificates are revoked.
<Althego>
good, that saved you from death
<darsie>
1337
<sandbox>
1337
<XXCoder>
;mission
<LunchBot>
You attempt career mode with zero starting funds. Wow.
<XXCoder>
wow indeed
<XXCoder>
easy enough, just sell off pile of junk around
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<packbart>
possibly a contract pays enough up-front to buy a capsule on a stick
<Eddi|zuHause>
doesn't admin have a policy to give you instant money?
<packbart>
yeah but the mission was unclear on that and I'm not sure if reputation can be sold. which would lead your starting science points
<packbart>
s/lead/leave/
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<Eddi|zuHause>
i think there were both versions that trade science or reputation for money
<Eddi|zuHause>
and at minimum you need enough cash for a command module to get science around the KSC
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<darsie>
One trick if you run out of money is to accept contracts and use the advances.
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<KrazyKrl>
;mission
<LunchBot>
Having cornered the market on model rockets and paper airplanes, you start sending your catalogs to the Kerbal Space Program. Consequences will never be the same.
<sandbox>
Truth
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<KrazyKrl>
;outcome add The error was rated "M" for "Mission Critical"
<LunchBot>
Added outcome: The error was rated "M" for "Mission Critical"
<KrazyKrl>
;mission add The launch was a success... but you repeatedly fail the captcha when you try to initiate stage separation.
<LunchBot>
Added mission: The launch was a success... but you repeatedly fail the captcha when you try to initiate stage separation.
<KrazyKrl>
why does stage separation require a captcha? because what if you're a robot?
<Eddi|zuHause>
!mission add You try to figure out what the blinking red light means.
<LunchBot>
Added mission: You try to figure out what the blinking red light means.
<KrazyKrl>
;outcome add You ostensibly succeed!
<LunchBot>
Added outcome: You ostensibly succeed!
<KrazyKrl>
;mission add The smuggled corn beef sandwich becomes lodged in the Co2 scrubbers.
<LunchBot>
Added mission: The smuggled corn beef sandwich becomes lodged in the Co2 scrubbers.
<KrazyKrl>
;mission add The irony drive becomes uncontrollable.
<LunchBot>
Added mission: The irony drive becomes uncontrollable.
<KrazyKrl>
;outcome add Congratulations on being the inspiration for the Teller-Ulam design!
<LunchBot>
Added outcome: Congratulations on being the inspiration for the Teller-Ulam design!
<KrazyKrl>
;mission add The physics package falls off of your rocket.
<LunchBot>
Added mission: The physics package falls off of your rocket.
<KrazyKrl>
;outcome add For some totally unrelated and completely unintentional (we swear, give us a polygraph) reason... Cobalt-Thorium-G was detected in the aftermath.
<LunchBot>
Added outcome: For some totally unrelated and completely unintentional (we swear, give us a polygraph) reason... Cobalt-Thorium-G was detected in the aftermath.
<KrazyKrl>
;outcome add Despite the gargantuan scale of collateral damage, no city ordinances were broken.
<LunchBot>
Added outcome: Despite the gargantuan scale of collateral damage, no city ordinances were broken.
<KrazyKrl>
;mission
<LunchBot>
You type !fission instead of !mission. Your rocket collapses under its weight onto your boss.
<KrazyKrl>
"Oh No! Anyway..." moment.
<KrazyKrl>
;outcome add Technically there are survivors... but any witnesses have had a small case of neural solubility.
<LunchBot>
Added outcome: Technically there are survivors... but any witnesses have had a small case of neural solubility.
<raptop>
KrazyKrl: FWIW I recently had to solve 4 captchas in the process of ordering a sandwich
<raptop>
(I swear, the place didn't want my money)
<raptop>
!outcome add You have awakened a Kraken, and contaminated it with Strontium-90.
<LunchBot>
Added outcome: You have awakened a Kraken, and contaminated it with Strontium-90.
<raptop>
(For context: watch the 1954 Godzilla movie. It's only like 90 minutes long)
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<Eddi|zuHause>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You measure the capacity of your fuel tanks in butts. Your disappointment is immeasurable and your day is ruined.
<raptop>
It's more based on the (apocryphal?) nikola tesla quote, but that movie also works
<XXCoder>
i know lol
<XXCoder>
im talking about mission/outcome combo
<raptop>
H
<raptop>
*ah
<XXCoder>
that super spikey thing in event horzon made me laugh a little when I first saw it
<darsie>
I accepted an Eve asteroid scanning contract, but didn't have an IR telescope there, so I have to do that.
<XXCoder>
so olviously it was horror movie
<Mat2ch>
ugh, Event Horizon. I had nightmares for years
<XXCoder>
largely immune to nightmares, but yeah it was pretty good horror movie lol
<XXCoder>
;mission
<LunchBot>
You install a flux capacitor on your rocket in an attempt to travel back in time. You're sad you wasted your time even entertaining this stupidity.
<XXCoder>
yeah no time travel for me
<Mat2ch>
XXCoder: It didn't help that I watched at night.
<Mat2ch>
shortly before I wanted to go to bed
<XXCoder>
ow heh
<Mat2ch>
now I never want to be on a space ship with such a propulsion
<raptop>
Just make sure that the Geller Field is working
<Mat2ch>
I'm glad I forgot most of the movie and now I'm going to bed ;P
<Mat2ch>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You attempt to mutate some neutrinos. The radiation vanishes in a burst of rocket parts.
<Mat2ch>
hehe
<XXCoder>
lol
<raptop>
yeah, that works
<Eddi|zuHause>
!mission
<LunchBot>
Val aborts the launch and starts the RTLS procedures. A penguin enters your office and installs Linux on all your rocket control computers.
<Eddi|zuHause>
finally.
<Eddi|zuHause>
was waiting for this dude for ages
<Eddi|zuHause>
"comes monday between 8:00 and 16:00"... as if