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<pato>
yo
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<Eddi|zuHause>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You realise you have been playing KSP for 24 hours straight. Your drag coefficient is over nine thousand!
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<Mat2ch>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You fly past Santa on your way to orbit. Your rocket goes plaid.
<Mat2ch>
Thanks Santa!
<Althego>
what was that? space ball one!
<sandbox>
!mission
<LunchBot>
Wernher walked in with a mischievous grin... The fire alarm keeps going off. After resetting it three times you send Mitdun Kerman to fix it. He reports back that he can't access it because the cargo bay is full of smoke. You reset it seven times more until it melts and stops going off. When Bill wakes up and asks about the smoke you tell him the fire alarm is faulty.
<sandbox>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You commence primary ignition. You succeed beyond your wildest nightmares.
<Eddi|zuHause>
today it keeps drifting into fever dream territory
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<sandbox>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You feed your kerbals catnip to see what will happen. You regret this for the rest of your Kerbals' lives.
<teddydd>
oh my...
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<KrazyKrl>
;mission
<LunchBot>
You zoom along at 110 m/s in the middle of the ocean with nothing around. You gain a great many Dark Side points for that.
<Azander>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You do not read the EULA. The rocket is in flames and you've lost your hat.
<Althego>
lawyers
<Althego>
they set everything on fire and even stole your hat
<Azander>
:(
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<Eddi|zuHause>
why does that read like the outline of an XKCD?
<Eddi|zuHause>
!mission
<LunchBot>
Increased frequency of Vermiscious Knid attacks force you to abandon your ship. The R&D facility "mysteriously" explodes.
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<raptop>
Apparently the R&D facility should have been better defended
<SnoopJ>
research and demolition?
<raptop>
Presumably
<sandbox>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You must gather your party before venturing forth. Eva Kerman goes on an EVA and the control loop turns into an Airplane! sketch.
<Althego>
recreation and demolition
<Mat2ch>
!mission
<LunchBot>
Orbit Kerbin with your second launch. Various kerbals suffer from terminal kinetic energy poisoning.
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<raptop>
underinvesting in the recovery systems, I guess
<sandbox>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You are escaping to the one place that hasn't been corrupted by capitalism! It's now always Monday. Always. And there's no coffee.
<Althego>
lol
<Althego>
sounds about right
<Althego>
instead of communist saturday it is communist monday. every day
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<Eddi|zuHause>
during communism we had school on saturday
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<Eddi|zuHause>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You start a fire using static electricity. Your rocket explodes, leaving pieces floating in air, having broken physics. You monster.
<Althego>
hehe
<Althego>
typical
<sandbox>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You install KSP on Linux in a VM in OSX in a VM in Windows ME. You are forced to use a slide rule.
<Althego>
fitting
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