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<raptop>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You were caught playing KSP when you should have been launching the new SpaceX Rocket. We will be consumed by their trajectorial instability!
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<Eddi|zuHause>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You embark on a mission to find and capture the Mock Turtle. Jeb eats your lunch.
<Eddi|zuHause>
aw man... i even put a post-it on it...
<raptop>
!outcome add Betty gives you a sink rate of ★★⯪☆☆.
<LunchBot>
Added outcome: Betty gives you a sink rate of ★★⯪☆☆.
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<Eddi|zuHause>
i seem to be missing the middle glyph
<raptop>
half-filled star
<raptop>
so the rating is 2.5/5 stars
<XXCoder>
;mission
<LunchBot>
You sit 3 days straight playing KSP and develop a thrombosis in your legs which eventually breaks free and blocks vital arteries. The Queen is yeeted off of the surface of the earth at 8km/s.
<XXCoder>
oh boy so me ponentally dying caused body of queen tp fly off eh
<raptop>
Lunchbot loves leaving out several critical intermediate steps
<XXCoder>
;mission add Certain bear comes in to wish everyone a happy Winds-day.
<LunchBot>
Added mission: Certain bear comes in to wish everyone a happy Winds-day.
<raptop>
?
<XXCoder>
pooh bear lol in blustery day
<raptop>
hrm
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<XXCoder>
;mission
<LunchBot>
You advocate for publishing your results in a closed-access journal. In the long run, this is a pretty good decision.
<XXCoder>
whew bad paper nobody reads.
<XXCoder>
more or less anyway
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<Mat2ch>
Again a combination that fits too well
<Mat2ch>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You attach rubber balls to a cactus and throw it around inside the space station. At least the more distant seismic sensors will get a lot of data from that.
<Mat2ch>
Come one. You can't crash a space station with that.
<FLHerne>
.mission add Everyone said I was daft to land a rover on a swamp, but you landed it all the same, just to show them. It sank into the swamp. So you built a second one. And that one sank into the swamp. So you built a third. That crashed on touchdown, fell over, and then sank into the swamp. But the fourth one stayed up!
<LunchBot>
Added mission: Everyone said I was daft to land a rover on a swamp, but you landed it all the same, just to show them. It sank into the swamp. So you built a second one. And that one sank into the swamp. So you built a third. That crashed on touchdown, fell over, and then sank into the swamp. But the fourth one stayed up!
<FLHerne>
(fixed the I->you swap I missed)
<Mat2ch>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You successfully dock with no RCS! The Vallhenge is activated, and performs its primary function of [DATA EXPUNGED].
<Eddi|zuHause>
the vallhenge is on vall?
<Eddi|zuHause>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You stare into the abyss. You attempt to correct this, but you rapidly realise your crew has eaten all the monopropellant.
<Eddi|zuHause>
why does that sound like the plot to a movie?
<Eddi|zuHause>
(probably noone survived)
<FLHerne>
Eddi|zuHause: assuming it follows the naming convention of Stonehenge, it's made of Vall
<FLHerne>
Eddi|zuHause: sounds a lot like Dark Star
<Eddi|zuHause>
naming conventions are weird. baby powder isn't made of babys
<FLHerne>
that's all you know
<Eddi|zuHause>
"Kinderdöner" :p
<FLHerne>
reminds me of
<FLHerne>
.stupid perfect food
<LunchBot>
Human babies are made of all the same things you're made of, except much fresher. That makes them the perfect food.
<Eddi|zuHause>
anyway, if it's at vall, chances are high that it's also made of vall :)
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<raptop>
The vallhenge is indeed on vall
<Torgo>
;outcome add Lucky for you, only a few of your legs were broken.
<LunchBot>
Added outcome: Lucky for you, only a few of your legs were broken.
<raptop>
Wait, how many legs do I have?
<Althego>
hehe
<Althego>
in cow an chicken when chicken's phantom leg was broken :)
<raptop>
(presumably a normal number for a human with an internal skeleton)
<Torgo>
;outcome add The good news is: The permanent organ damage was nearly fatal.
<LunchBot>
Added outcome: The good news is: The permanent organ damage was nearly fatal.
<Torgo>
;outcome add You're suffering from organ damage. Your pianist is not happy.
<LunchBot>
Added outcome: You're suffering from organ damage. Your pianist is not happy.
<raptop>
adding boosters and struts to the organ will solve things, right?
<Torgo>
I mean, a pipe organ already has tubes... all you need is explosives.
<Torgo>
;outcome add Luckily, the planet is now uninhabited.
<LunchBot>
Added outcome: Luckily, the planet is now uninhabited.
<Torgo>
;mission add Bob exclaims "I am not a fish!" as he reads the test results... "Salmonella: Positive"
<LunchBot>
Added mission: Bob exclaims "I am not a fish!" as he reads the test results... "Salmonella: Positive"
<Althego>
neither salmon, nor ella
<raptop>
But a secret third thing
<Torgo>
;mission add You create a device that converts quality into quantity... except it only works on everyone's bones.
<LunchBot>
Added mission: You create a device that converts quality into quantity... except it only works on everyone's bones.
<raptop>
So I can't use it to make infinite mystery goo?
<Torgo>
i mean, it might make your bones goo-like if you get enough bones.
<LunchBot>
Time loops along side your for loops and while loops. Poison? Explosives? Acid? ... Poisonous exploding acid.
<Eddi|zuHause>
that sounds accurate
<FLHerne>
also a Narbonic reference, iirc
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<raptop>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You write a technical report about "fussion" reactor technology. You fool! The Zectronic beam controller will now not only explode, it will implode!
<raptop>
...honestly, the outcome fits
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<FLHerne>
.mission add Someone claims to have invented a room-temperature superconductor.
<LunchBot>
Added mission: Someone claims to have invented a room-temperature superconductor.
<FLHerne>
too soon?
<raptop>
Nah
<raptop>
Just don't confuse the Meissner effect with diamagnetism
<raptop>
!8ball Are eggs a good replacement for snacks?
<LunchBot>
THERE IS AS YET INSUFFICIENT DATA FOR A MEANINGFUL ANSWER.
<FLHerne>
!8ball eat more eggs and snacks, then get back to me
<LunchBot>
Yup.
<FLHerne>
!8ball so are they?
<LunchBot>
DECEARING EGG.
<raptop>
That's far too appropriate
<FLHerne>
further research on the meaning of "DECEARING" may be required
<Mat2ch>
Does LunchBot remember the 8ball answers?
<FLHerne>
no
<FLHerne>
at least, it isn't supposed to
<FLHerne>
not sure I'm answering the right question -- !8ball is implemented as !mission, it remembers answers added to it but there's no persistent state in answering silly questions
<FLHerne>
!answer add No question.
<LunchBot>
"No question." is already a known answer!
<FLHerne>
oh
<Mat2ch>
Ha!
<Mat2ch>
So the DECEARING EGG was really just chance?
<FLHerne>
jan keeps telling the RNG is rigged somehow, and I occasionally suspect it of being sentient :p
<FLHerne>
!stupid nextbankruptcy
<LunchBot>
<ZLSA> F for Firefly || <raptop> What, again? || <sasamj> add that to the bankruptcy list || <electrokitty> !nextbankruptcy || <LunchBot> electrokitty: Firefly Aerospace, again.
<raptop>
That was eerie
<FLHerne>
!nextbankruptcy
<LunchBot>
China Rocket Co., Ltd.
<FLHerne>
who
* raptop
has no idea who those various chinese rocket startups are
<FLHerne>
hm
<FLHerne>
they've so far successfully launched to orbit twice, once with a Jielong 1 in 2019 and once with Jielong 3 last year
<FLHerne>
next launch this September supposedly
<FLHerne>
payload 1500kg to SSO, which for a small launcher is reasonable