<LunchBot>
You are inspired by an XKCD what-if. You are smashed by Grabthar's Hammer.
<raptop>
Obviously someone thought it necessary to prevent my plans from coming to fruition
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<XXCoder>
thankfully, as many of those is bad
<XXCoder>
what if you was setting up for 0.98c baseball ball velocity
<XXCoder>
;mission
<LunchBot>
You launch the KASA Marmite Explorer. You are beaten up by ULA lobbyists in the parking lot.
<XXCoder>
they didnt like my explorer I guess
<raptop>
It's fine, the baseball's lorenz factor is just barely over 5
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<FLHerne>
.outcome over 9000
<LunchBot>
No outcome found matching "over 9000".
<FLHerne>
.outcome add Your Lorenz factor is over 9000!
<LunchBot>
Added outcome: Your Lorenz factor is over 9000!
<XXCoder>
lol
<FLHerne>
I'm sure there's an 'over 9000' in there already
<XXCoder>
;outcome 9000
<LunchBot>
Your Lorenz factor is over 9000!
<XXCoder>
seems not?
<Althego>
hehe
<XXCoder>
we all failed
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<FLHerne>
.outcome add Jeb gets hydrocuted.
<LunchBot>
Added outcome: Jeb gets hydrocuted.
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<FLHerne>
.outcome add Val crashes the success party.
<LunchBot>
Added outcome: Val crashes the success party.
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<FLHerne>
.mission add To promote the use of apostrophes, you define the word "dont" to mean "absolutely do, with urgency".
<LunchBot>
Added mission: To promote the use of apostrophes, you define the word "dont" to mean "absolutely do, with urgency".
<Althego>
do or do not, there is no dont :)
<sandbox>
do orthodontist
<Azander>
;mission
<LunchBot>
Annoyed at the high stability and low energy density of corium, you switch to mining cordium. So, you must be asking yourself: What the f*** happened? But first: AAAAAAA...
<Althego>
and after cordium, you switch to discordium :)
<XXCoder>
hah
<XXCoder>
;mission
<LunchBot>
You replace anything electrical on your craft with potatoes. You are eaten by a Giant Purple People Eater.
<XXCoder>
might have confused craft with snack bar
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<KrazyKrl>
crafting the craft's snack bar's snack bars?
<FLHerne>
TIL that the Purple People Eater is so named because it eats purple people
<FLHerne>
its own colour is unknown
<FLHerne>
I guess this one must be green-purple colourblind
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<funkenstein>
;outcome add They have taken the Astronaut Complex and the VAB. We have barred the doors, but cannot hold them for long. The ground shakes... Boosters. Boosters in the deep. We cannot lift off. A Kerbal moves in the dark... We cannot lift off... They are coming.
<LunchBot>
Added outcome: They have taken the Astronaut Complex and the VAB. We have barred the doors, but cannot hold them for long. The ground shakes... Boosters. Boosters in the deep. We cannot lift off. A Kerbal moves in the dark... We cannot lift off... They are coming.
<funkenstein>
;mission
<LunchBot>
Annoyed with simulation inaccuracies, you insist on Infinite Element Analysis. It was inevitable, given the Mk3 adaptor mass ratios and prices.
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<raptop>
Hrm, the kerbals have once again delved to greedily and too high
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<Mat2ch>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You deploy a squad of black helicopters. It sets a new record for the Island Express.
<Mat2ch>
Direct route!
<raptop>
I was not expecting that to be a viable solution, but hey
<Mat2ch>
And to counter the engines a bit more power could be better
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<Eddi|zuHause>
i don't know how, but twitch is broken for me...
<Eddi|zuHause>
!mission
<LunchBot>
You expose the conspiracy to promote a false planet known as "Dres". As a side hussle, you start a novelty confectionary company called "Rocket Candy".
<Eddi|zuHause>
that's probably backwards... because the conspiracy thing is a great promotion campaign
<SporkWitch>
Althego: do you know about where in the stream the test was?
<SporkWitch>
yeah, it's just the word choice that threw me. they said full-power, not full-preasure, and i somewhat suspect it was deliberate to get clicks and make it seem more exciting than it was. Not to say it wasn't still cool, the misleading just took some away from it for me
<SporkWitch>
huh, x.com is literally just a redirect to twitter right now, you'd think they'd set it up the other way around. Wonder if it has to do with indonesia's rules... (x.com is getting caught up in their anti-porn laws lol)
<Mat2ch>
Wonder when it comes out that Musk fakes the active twitter users like he does the Tesla ranges... :P
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<Izzy>
looking forward to "the delta-V predictions in your starship were optimistic. enjoy starvation and death."
<XXCoder>
;mission
<LunchBot>
You use regular expressions to parse HTML. PrefixCactus turns out to secretly be a kerbal.
<XXCoder>
many steps missing
<raptop>
Well, we all know what happens from the first step, so presumably extremely arbitrariy things can occur afterwards
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