raptop changed the topic of #KSPOfficial to: Kerbal Space Program official channel | KSP2 current version: 0.1.2.0 | Rules: http://tinyurl.com/KSP-Rules | Δv maps: https://i.imgur.com/CHVnEeE.png https://i.imgur.com/gBoLsSt.png | The Kapybaras were wildly OP, and have been nerfed.
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<FLHerne> .mission add You discover that Kerbals are small human children in costumes. Feeling guilty about blowing so many up in hilarious ways, you decide to make amends.
<LunchBot> Added mission: You discover that Kerbals are small human children in costumes. Feeling guilty about blowing so many up in hilarious ways, you decide to make amends.
<XXCoder> oh boy that went dark in a hurry
<XXCoder> ;mission
<LunchBot> You take a wrong turn at Alcubierre. You come down with a bad case of Raptor Cough.
<XXCoder> time traveled too I guess
<FLHerne> ;outcome add You shout "FIRE!", but instead of evacuating your crew start manning the weapons.
<LunchBot> Added outcome: You shout "FIRE!", but instead of evacuating your crew start manning the weapons.
<FLHerne> kerballing?
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<raptop> Ah, further evidence that kerbals are actually orks
<darsie> Klingons?
<sandbox> ;mission
<LunchBot> You attempt laxative calculus. You are unable to get NEAR.
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<raptop> uh
<Althego> icarus proudbottom in the curse of the chocolate fountain
<raptop> !mission
<LunchBot> You design and build a bagel museum. You are having a really bad problem and you will not go to space today.
<raptop> Bagels are more important than space!
<raptop> At least that's what I'm going to claim if Bill asks where the LOX went
<raptop> !8ball Is smoked salmon a good oxidizer?
<LunchBot> The stars say so.
<Althego> lol
<Althego> they are wrong
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<KrazyKrl> ;8ball are the stars wrong?
<LunchBot> Your question has been outsourced to Boeing. The primary deliverable ("answer") is expected by Q3 2025.
<Althego> hehe
<Althego> too soon
<Althego> make it 2035
<raptop> The stars are always wrong; when was the last time you saw cthulhu?
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<Althego> supposedly historic livestream from mars soon https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4qyVNqeJ6wQ
<Mat2ch> uh
<Mat2ch> nice
<Althego> hehe livestream
<Mat2ch> well, "16 min"-live ;)
<Althego> new image every few minutes
<sandbox> I would've never thought about keeping batteries in the fridge
<sandbox> seems risky to me
<Mat2ch> Why? Cold means the chemistry is slower
<sandbox> too much moisture
<Mat2ch> Put it in a sealed box.
<Althego> it is in a sealed box already
<Althego> its own casing
<packbart> if you've got excessive moisture in your fridge, something's wrong
<Mat2ch> Althego: but the contacts and wires could corrode
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<sandbox> ;mission
<LunchBot> You fashion a sort of industrial strength Faberge egg – intricate, wonderfully worked, refined beyond all ordinary desires, a museum piece from the start. This somehow increases your stock valuation.
<Althego> kind of obvious
<Althego> ;mission tannhauser
<LunchBot> No mission found matching "tannhauser".
<Althego> ;mission tannhäuser
<LunchBot> You watch C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhäuser Gate.
<KrazyKrl> ;mission add Bob attempts to microwave some shellfish in the Science Jr. which causes a minor clam-ity.
<LunchBot> Added mission: Bob attempts to microwave some shellfish in the Science Jr. which causes a minor clam-ity.
<Althego> eh
<Eddi|zuHause> isn't that an outcome?
<Althego> ;outcome outcome
<LunchBot> UmbralRaptor adds more ;missions and ;outcomes to LunchBot.
<Eddi|zuHause> !mission
<LunchBot> Across the gulf of space, minds that are to our minds as ours are to those of the beasts that perish, intellects vast and cool and unsympathetic, regard Kerbin with envious eyes, and slowly and surely draw their plans against us. The Kraken dines on your kerbals.
<Althego> ;outcome mission
<LunchBot> Turns out mission planning technique is more important than rocket size.
<packbart> like tears of a unicorn, lost in the rain
<Althego> heh cant find it. there is one about chat arguing if it is a mission or outcome
<Eddi|zuHause> i know that one
<packbart> I've recently seen that one
<Eddi|zuHause> !outcome chat
<LunchBot> You can't prove you aren't a chatbot.
<Eddi|zuHause> !mission chat
<LunchBot> ;mission becomes the sole source of entertainment in the KSP chat.
<Eddi|zuHause> that pretty much came true
<KrazyKrl> ;outcome everyone argues with you
<LunchBot> Everyone argues with you about whether or not this should have been a mission or an outcome.
<Eddi|zuHause> so... the intellect of the kraken...
<Eddi|zuHause> reads like a poem...
<Eddi|zuHause> means i need to read it 5 times before it starts to make sense :p
<raptop> That mission is apparently yoinked from the H G Wells novel "War of the Worlds"
<Althego> ;outcome add Tonight we dine in space!
<LunchBot> Added outcome: Tonight we dine in space!
<Mat2ch> That is a great one
<Eddi|zuHause> that's the one with the mass panic, which probably was invented by the press media to discredit that new fangled radio thingie
<packbart> Orson Welles adapting H.G. Wells
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<Eddi|zuHause> !mission
<LunchBot> You invent a time machine powered by consuming alternate universes that "probably don't want to exist so much." :thonk:
<Althego> i guess somebody else used up your alternate universe. and that makes that sound
<Eddi|zuHause> better than someone else using up my REAL universe.
<Eddi|zuHause> (Internet slang) Used ironically in reaction to a conclusion seen as illogical.
<Eddi|zuHause> That guy robbed me once already, so he won't do it again. Thonk.
<raptop> Also in some places it'll be used as a low quality version of this emoji 🤔
<Eddi|zuHause> anyway, how are these combos always fitting so well. are we sure this is a bot? :p
<Althego> we dont knwo the code, somebody could have preselected combinations
<Althego> but yes, lately they fit too welll
<Althego> i mean yes our brains try to rationalize it anyway, but often it is just too unrelated for that. or at least should be, but not anymore
<raptop> It's just random, but we do sometimes mock the RNG in other channels
<packbart> it's a superpower of the human brain to see well fitted structure in randomness. and the missions and outcomes are a curated randomness to boot
<Althego> maybe this is the sign that we are in the matrix
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<packbart> !outcome add [Outcome elided. Turing Limit exceeded.]
<LunchBot> Added outcome: [Outcome elided. Turing Limit exceeded.]
<Althego> ;mission add You successfully compute the Chaitin omega number.
<LunchBot> Added mission: You successfully compute the Chaitin omega number.
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<Eddi|zuHause> !outcome add 42.
<LunchBot> Added outcome: 42.
<XXCoder> ;mission
<LunchBot> You try to verify if the Sega Genesis has blast processing. This instigates an egregious netsplit in #kspofficial.
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<XXCoder> wow sega broke urc
<Eddi|zuHause> apparently it was a blast :p
<XXCoder> *irc
<XXCoder> yep
<Mat2ch> !mission
<LunchBot> You measure the capacity of your fuel tanks in butts. Jeb is judged to weigh decidedly less than a duck.
<Mat2ch> Yeah, that happens if you don't stick to metric units!
<XXCoder> all kinds of units lol
<Mat2ch> I've never heard of "duck" as a unit, but somewhere in the english speaking world it is probably used
<Mat2ch> like "we found a goose that weight more than a duck" or so
<Mat2ch> *weighed
<Mat2ch> In fact it weighed 3 duck.
<XXCoder> usa news use all units but imperial or meteric
<Mat2ch> There's a storm the size of Kuba coming!
<XXCoder> yeah even if people cant visualize it. I remember some news saying something was 200+ football fields long
<XXCoder> like anyone can visualize that
<Mat2ch> hehe
<Mat2ch> I can't visualize one field
<XXCoder> I can because I played football growing up :D
<Mat2ch> but the reason may be that I wasn't near one for years...
<XXCoder> its 100 yards so its near 100 meters long
<Mat2ch> I remember hating jogging around it.
<Mat2ch> I still wonder how I managed to do the 2.5 km run for some school sports event
* Mat2ch was never the marathon type...
<Azander> !mission
<LunchBot> It's Jebbin' time! You have a bad feeling about this.
<Mat2ch> I would, too...
<Azander> yeah
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<sandbox> ;mission
<LunchBot> You slow down to speed up. All of half of your landing ship have landed on Mun intact!
<Mat2ch> So the one part did slow down and the other sped up. Got it.
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<sandbox> ;mission
<LunchBot> You design a series of planetary probes around the paradigm of exchanging reaction mass for ablative lithobraking equipment. Your mission is foiled by nefarious porpoises.
<XXCoder> oh boy what sea animals?
<XXCoder> thought kerbin only has grass trees and kerbals
<packbart> aquabraking is even more deadly in KSP than lithobraking
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